I find it amusing at the moment that my daughter, who last March dropped me off at the hospital like a piece of trash, left me alone in the waiting room for hours before my scheduled surgery, never bothered to come visit while I was there, and didn’t come to see me until a few days after I was home, is now adamantly declaring her intention to not only transport me up there on Monday, but sit thru the entire surgery and recovery. I have done my best to explain that I will not know she is there – she is better off doing something productive with her time (like working and making money) and visiting when I am coherent and able to appreciate it. Guilt does strange things to people. Her best friend’s father died last night of cancer. Her fiancee’s best friend’s mother died a week or so ago of the same thing. I loathe cancer. But as I pointed out to my “concerned ” daughter – when I HAVE needed her in the past, she has not been there for me. I get blown off all the time. So I stopped relying on her and took matters into my own hands. Now that I don’t want or need her there, she is insistent on being there the entire time. Ah, to be 21 and oh so full of yourself again. You want to help? Come clean my house. Come walk my dogs. Come cook some meals. THAT’s how you can help. Not by being a martyr in a waiting room. Oh yes – I forgot – she was born on Martin Luther King Jr’s & Joan of Arc’s birthday – she is born into the martyr complex. I am not buying it. I have told my mother I don’t want her there – she will not listen either. Where were all these people when I REALLY NEEDED THEM????? Oh that’s right – they were too busy for me. Well – perhaps some of my feelings toward the subject will rear their ugly heads while I am coming out of anesthesia – if I do. Maybe then they can understand that I need help when I ASK – not when YOU THINK I DO. Bitter? Oh hell yeah. Now if you will excuse me – I have things to get done before my big day that can only be done while the business world is still open.